What We Learned About Doug Emhoff in His Talk About His Wife
The second gentleman describes Kamala Harris as joyful and tough while making fun of himself in DNC speech.
When Second Gentleman Doug Emhoff took the stage extolling the virtues of his wife, Vice President Kamala Harris, at the Democratic National Convention Tuesday night, it was a historic moment that gave the country a glimpse of what it might be like with a first-ever first gentleman if Harris goes on to win the presidential election.
In fact, his lighthearted and at times self-deprecating address showed that as far as potential presidential spouses go, he didn’t deviate much from traditional speeches of the past by the wives of candidates.
“Kamala rises to the occasion,” Emhoff said. “Now that the country needs her … she is ready to lead.”
He went on to describe Harris, 59, as bringing “joy and toughness” to her work that has included serving as attorney general of California and district attorney of San Francisco before entering politics as a U.S. senator from California and then first female vice president. Her career path, Emhoff said, has been motivated by her will to stand up to bullies and pursue justice.
Emhoff, 59, was born in Brooklyn, a borough of New York, and raised in Matawan, New Jersey, where he had “a typical childhood.” He spoke about moving to the Los Angeles area with his family as a teenager when his dad took a new job.
One question fielded by scholars studying presidential spouses includes how a potential first gentleman would differ from first ladies.
“Doug Emhoff's speech answers that question—not much," said Diana Carlin, professor emerita of communication at Saint Louis University. “Presidents' wives have first and foremost been seen supporting their husbands as their first priority, and that is what Doug Emhoff did.”
Carlin, co-author of Remember the First Ladies: The Legacies of America’s History-Making Women, noted that Emhoff did it similarly to candidates' wives since Barbara Bush in 1992 who used the convention speech to give some personal insights into the candidate's background that projects a leadership style and to connect a presidential family to Americans' families.
Elizabeth Natalle, a First Ladies Studies scholar and professor emerita in communication from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro, agreed saying Doug Emhoff did nothing different from what all the women before him have done.
“Spouses paint a picture of a family ‘just like yours’ when it comes right down to it and they humanize the candidate,” said Natalle, co-editor of the book Michelle Obama: First Lady, American Rhetor. “This is exactly what Doug did for Kamala.”
Viewers gleaned from Emhoff’s speech that Harris takes an active role in their blended family by taking charge of Sunday dinners and that his children, Cole, 30, and Ella, 25, (with his first wife, Kerstin) embrace Harris by calling her “Momala.”
And as they sit around the dinner table, the conversation, prompted by his wife, would revolve around what problems in the world they want to solve, Emhoff shared.
Emhoff’s son, Cole, introduced his father in a video before Emhoff took the stage talking about Harris’s rise and making light of his father.
“Our blended family wasn’t used to politics or the spotlight, but when Kamala became senator we were all excited to step up, especially my dad. Then, Kamala became vice president. It felt like Doug was a bit out of place on Capitol Hill. I thought, ‘What is my goofy dad doing here?’ But he embraced it,” his son said.
Cole Emhoff told his father's life story and his own story of life with Harris to set the stage for the second gentleman’s self-deprecating humor and to paint a picture of a blended family that works, according to Carlin.
“Given the number of blended families in the country, Emhoff provided a point of identification for those who don't know much about him and Harris,” Carlin said. “Emhoff said that Harris was the ‘right person’ for his family and that at ‘this moment’ she is the right person for the American family.”
In many ways, Emhoff’s remarks showed he is a regular guy. He shared how he took pride in working at McDonald’s in high school and was even employee of the month. Later, he worked full time so he could attend college part time. He went on to law school and eventually began working as a lawyer. And, he is still friends with the same guys in his Fantasy Football league.
The second gentleman also shared how he met his future wife–on a blind date–and the awkwardness he felt when he first called her, leaving a message on her voicemail at 8:30 in the morning.
“Hey, it’s Douuug,” he said, recalling how he rambled on regretting how the words stumbled out of his mouth. Then he added, “Kamala saved that voice mail and makes me listen to it on every anniversary.”
Speeches from those who are not yet a first partner, also give the candidate’s spouse an opportunity to introduce themselves and provide a hint of what kind of presidential partner they will be, Carlin said.
“As second gentleman, Emhoff leads an anti-semitism initiative, which he referenced. He has a cause rooted in his personal story, and the reference suggests he will continue. He displayed his personality, sense of humor, and comfort with his role,” Carlin said, adding that his ten years as Harris's husband have seen him at her side throughout and that is where he will continue to be while also pursuing his own career as Dr. Jill Biden, who teaches English at a community college in the Washington, D.C. area, has done.
Speeches of an aspiring first partner or one seeking a second term, cannot be overly political, according to Carlinn.
“Spouses are not the candidate. However, they can take on the opponent in subtle ways, and Emhoff did that with his references to his wife's laugh,” Carlin said.
During his speech, Emhoff spoke about his wife’s laugh that has been the subject of attacks by her opponent, Donald Trump.
“You know that laugh. I love that laugh,” Emhoff said.
“You know that laugh. I love that laugh,” Emhoff said.
He did not have to say Donald Trump's name or reference his attacks on Harris's laugh for the audience to get the message, Carlin said. Rather, he modeled how her supporters should approach personal attacks. His frequent references to their family life and to the rapport she has with her stepchildren was a direct counter to J.D. Vance's attacks on “childless cat ladies” again without any direct reference, Carlin added.
As Emhoff concluded his address he returned to this depiction of his wife: a joyful warrior.
Joyful warriors are still warriors, he said, “and Kamala is as tough as it comes.”